To a certain degree, worry can be healthy and productive if it leads us to come up with solutions to problems and gets us motivated. However, if taken to the extreme, it can lead to a great deal of anxiety and be quite debilitating. I saw a quote from author Dan Zadra not too long ago that seems appropriate here:  “Worry is a misuse of imagination.” When we worry, it can certainly take us on a “mind trip” as we picture worst-case scenarios and fear dreaded outcomes. I love another quote I discovered last week from author Leo Buscaglia: “Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy.”

How much time do we really want to spend worrying? It has been suggested that chronic worriers learn to break this habit by scheduling a regular “worry time” each day (or several times a week), where they give themselves permission during this set-aside time to focus completely on anything they are worried about. The key is to catch yourself when it’s not “worry time,” and to put it off until you’ve “scheduled” it. This may take some practice, but I know several people who have found this very effective. As time goes by, they begin to realize how much better they feel when they are not constantly worrying. (TIP: Write that worry down and place it in a Worry File, to be addressed during your scheduled Worry Time.) Spending less time worrying frees up your your energy and your mind. That’s why I like another quote I just discovered:

 You can’t change YESTERDAY
But you can ruin TODAY
By worrying about TOMORROW.

Do you really want to “ruin today?” That doesn’t sound like much fun either. And, in any moment, each of us has a choice about what we think about. We can choose thoughts (including worry) that drag us down, or we can choose thoughts that lift us up. Again, this takes practice, but the end result can be quite magical. Try it!

Recommended Resource
In doing some research online about worry, I discovered an amazing website: www.HELPGUIDE.org, “a trusted non-profit resource; expert, ad-free (to) help you resolve health challenges.” In an article there entitled, “How to Stop Worrying,” it states that “chronic worrying is a mental habit that can be broken. You can train your brain to stay calm and look at life from a more positive perspective…. Once you realize that worrying is the problem, not the solution, you can regain control of your worried mind.”

Closing quotes
“Drag your thoughts away from your troubles…by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it.”             –Mark Twain

“Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen.
Keep in the sunlight.”              –Ben Franklin

May we each strive to worry less and keep as much as possible in the sunlight.

The post What? Me Worry? appeared first on Conscious Order.

“Escape” has many meanings (according to an online Thesaurus):
To flee, run away, get away, break out, break away from…
Sometimes we may feel like fleeing or running away from our clutter, but that’s not going to make it go away. That’s why I like the concept of “breaking away” from clutter. It implies a process of detaching from it—looking at it more objectively, with less emotional attachment. This isn’t always an easy thing to do, but if we keep telling ourselves, “It’s too hard,” then it’s going to continue to be “too hard.” Start telling yourself that it’s getting easier.

Affirmation: It is getting easier to break away and let go of clutter.

“Your” has no other synonyms. However, it does imply only dealing with your own clutter—not someone else’s. This might not be the case if you have young children, because it often takes awhile to get them to pick up after themselves, but I do not advise anyone to get rid of someone else’s clutter without permission to do so. If you live with someone else’s clutter, take care of your own first. Your example can sometimes inspire them to clear out their own.

Affirmation: I am learning to let go of my clutter, one space at a time.

“Clutter” also has many meanings:
Mess, litter, disorder, confusion, untidiness, muddle…
As discussed quite extensively in my book (pp. 146-149), “physical clutter” means different things to different people—things we don’t use, don’t know what they’re for, don’t know where to put, don’t want to deal with, etc.
I’m a great advocate for clearing out the “mental clutter” first—all our to-do’s and plans, worries and fears, regrets and expectations, plus all the self-defeating thoughts and words that run through our heads. When our clear this clutter from our mind, it’s easier to make decisions and clear out the clutter in our home, our office and our life.
I don’t know of any clutter that makes us feel good—it all weighs us down and makes us feel pretty awful, right? And it’s much easier to get things done when we feel good!

Affirmation: Clearing out my clutter makes me feel better.

“Prison” is one of my least favorite words, bringing up images of criminals and darkness, but some of its synonyms might provide us with incentives to break free:
Jail, incarceration, penitentiary, penal complex, secure unit, reformatory…
Hmmm….none of these words resonate very much, but sometimes our clutter can make us feel more “secure,” especially if it is familiar and comforting. There are things that may no longer be “useful, meaningful and beautiful,” but they still tug at our heartstrings, especially if we are sentimental.
Perhaps its better to think about how we might feel in our “Clutter Prison”…fenced in, confined, trapped, afraid, limited, depressed, hopeless? And wouldn’t it be wonderful to break free of these feelings that drag us down.

Affirmation: I am breaking free from my clutter, starting right now!

May we all break free from our clutter in 2013!

The post Escape Your Clutter Prison! appeared first on Conscious Order.

Pause.
Take time to renew and restore from the busy-ness of the holiday season. Sleeping in, taking a long walk, reading a good book, watching a good movie, even taking a few deep breaths, can rejuvenate us as we ponder the coming months and what we’d like to do. It’s much easier to think straight and clearly when we are rested.

Praise.
Acknowledge all that you accomplished in 2012. Even the smallest task completed can uplift us if we only take the time to acknowledge that it has been done. I encourage my clients after each completion, large or small, to stop, affirm, and say a silent “Yay me!” Better still, say it out loud!

Ponder.
Think about what you’d like to experience more of in 2013—balance, harmony, clarity, order, joy, peace, freedom, simplicity. If all of the above, focus on 1 or 2 at first, and use them as guidelines as you make decisions. (See Conscious Order, pp. 38-40 for more.) My words for 2013 are simplicity and expansion.

Plan.
Keeping all our to-do’s swimming around in our mind can be very distracting and overwhelming. Take time to create a Master To Do List so that everything is out of your mind and onto paper or listed electronically (p. 273). It can be more manageable if the to-do’s are broken down into categories for quick reference.

Prioritize.
We can’t do everything at once. Decide what is most important for you to do in the next few weeks and don’t worry about the rest for now. This by itself can be less stressful. When it’s time to review your Master List, repeat this process.

Pace.
Sometimes going slower can have more lasting results. Go at YOUR pace, not the pace that someone else has imposed on you. If there are deadlines, these can be useful, especially for those of us for whom target dates inspire higher levels of productivity.

Purge.
Create room for current projects and records. Move last year’s financial records to a “prepare for taxes” box, for example, or clear out an over-stuffed file drawer for easier access and use for current and future projects.

Prepare.
Many of my clients and students prepare an “Affirmation Space” or “Reminder Space” that is cleared off and kept clutter-free (pp. 52-55). Meaningful objects can be thoughtfully placed there, but if horizontal surfaces become “magnets” for clutter, commit to keeping this space clutter-free for awhile. It can remind you of the new order you are creating, and it affirms a “yes-I-can” energy that can be quite powerful!

Praise.
Yes, this is a repeat. Take time to acknowledge anything you do that is helping you prepare for the New Year…and each project, large or small, that is completed as the year progresses. What you are grateful for increases. Be thankful for the new order you are creating.

Be Gentle With Yourself…Change Takes Time.
Speaking of being gentle, let us not only be gentle and kind to ourselves, let us make a conscious effort to be gentle and kind to others—to everyone we meet. Let’s each do our part to make the world a better place.

(P.S.  All of the concepts here are discussed more fully in my book. That’s why I’ve included some page references.)

Affirmation:
I am creating the order and peace of mind I desire.

The post Getting Organized in the New Year appeared first on Conscious Order.

*
Believing
in the true
spirit of
the holidays,
I commit myself to
*
Remember those people
who truly need my gifts,
keeping in mind that gifts
are not always things.
*
Express my love in more
direct ways than gifts.
*
Appreciate the beauty
of everything around me.
*
Examine my holiday activities in the
light of my deepest values, knowing I am
an expression of Peace, Order and Harmony.
*
Remember the Light within, even in the darkness.
*
Rededicate
myself to
growing &
evolving,
and taking
time for
just being.

Blessed be.

The post Organizing with the Spirit of the Holidays appeared first on Conscious Order.

“If Plan A fails, remember that the alphabet has 25 more letters.”
— from First for Busy Women, 10/1/12 edition.

The past year turned out much differently than expected for a whole lot of reasons. Fortunately there were many joyful events (including the recent birth of my 7^th grandchild, so of course I was in Connecticut for nearly 3 weeks!). But there were also several unexpected challenges that caused me to put a lot of things on the back burner. As I reflect on this past year, I’ve learned a lot more about myself and how I react or respond to the unexpected. I’ve also watched myself turn from distress, self-blame and frustration, into a place of fertile growth, acceptance and peace (most of the time!).

Here are some thoughts and tips to help us through those times when things are not going the way we had planned.

1. Things Happen. No matter how well we map things out, understand that there are times when the unexpected happens.

2. What is Really Important? Sometimes we get so caught up in a project or a goal, and what appear to be “urgent” matters, that we can forget what’s really important. Think of some of those unexpected events you’ve experienced. A health issue (yours or someone else’s) can certainly cause everything else to be set aside, as can the death of a loved one (including a pet). There could be crises at work, at home, or with friends or relatives that become very important and require time-consuming energy and attention. Rearranging priorities is often a must; giving ourselves permission to let go of our original plan(s) can often alleviate a lot of stress.

3. Take Responsibility. In earlier stages of my life, it was very easy to blame others for what was going on in my life. But now I realize that I am the only one responsible for whatever is happening in my life—not necessarily for those unexpected events, but certainly for the way I perceive and handle them.

4. React or Respond? Many years ago a teacher of mine reminded me that “react” means to do something over again the same way—to re-act. Most of the time I now choose to “respond,” meaning I can instantly pause and seek a higher view of something as quickly as possible. So instead of lashing out in anger or internalizing deep hurt and upset, I can take a few deep breaths and respond in a healthier way, with a quicker resolution.

5. We Get to Decide. Whenever anything happens, we get to decide how we are going to react or respond. We can choose anger, frustration, and/or resentment. These all very natural ways to react to something, but they are also very “toxic” to our systems—emotionally, psychologically, physically, mentally, and spiritually—especially if we choose to hang on to them for any length of time.It takes practice, but we can choose to look at what’s happening from a different perspective and thus have a different response and a different experience.

6. What Are You Saying to Yourself? We can give ourselves a huge boost when we choose to change those words and thoughts that drag us down into those that lift us up. How draining it can be to keep saying, “I am never going to get this done,” or “What’s the matter with me?” or “Why can’t I handle this better?” Become more aware of what you say to yourself when things aren’t going the way you’d planned. Know that you can choose to change what you say. For example, “I will get this done when it is the right timing,” or “I am getting better at adjusting to the unexpected,” or “I am learning to handle things better.”

7. Learn to See Things from a Higher Place. It’s very easy to get caught up in the chaos and stress that the unexpected can create. It’s like being on the ground in an airplane and seeing so much happening all at once—fueling, flight check, food, baggage, ground and air traffic—and getting caught up in all the busy-ness. After take-off, we leave all this activity behind and begin to see the bigger picture—the patterns of the roadways and cities, the rivers and the mountains, and the vastness of the countryside and the sky. Ahhhh, much more peaceful. We can do this in our mind if we stop and take a couple of deep breaths. No matter what is going on, we can choose that higher view that brings us peace in any given moment.

8. Get Into Present Moment. This takes practice, practice, practice. However, the results can be quite remarkable because this is the best way to get to that “higher place.” It’s very easy (and human) to think about things in the Past (yesterday or years ago) with regrets and if-only’s. It’s also often easy (and human) to think about the Future with worries and fears. However, it is only in the Present moment that anything is done—this is where you can choose a different thought, action, perspective, or attitude that can set you on a different course.

 Don’t let yesterday or tomorrow use up too much of today!

9. See the Opportunities for Growth. If something is challenging and throwing us off course, I believe there is always some good that can come out of it, even if we can’t see it at the time. My mother would often say, “Everything happens for a reason.” It took me awhile to get this, but it’s helped me through a lot over the years. Sometimes our greatest challenges create our greatest growth and give us an opportunity to recognize how strong and resilient we are. So when the unexpected happens, we can ask, “What is it I’m supposed to learn from this?” and then listen for the answers. Our wisdom increases and, at least some of the time, we are better able to cope with whatever comes our way.

Perhaps some of these thoughts and tips will help you along your journey, whether you’re working on Plan A, B, C or Z.

Peace and blessings to you always.

The post Planning: When Plan A, B or C Isn’t Working appeared first on Conscious Order.

How About a New Beginning and a Fresh Approach?

1. Reflect on 2011…all sorts of things may have happened that felt like real challenges and created a lot of stress…AND, I invite you to go back through last year and make a list of all that you accomplished during 2011. (I like to take out my calendar and review it during this process.)

• Think about the things you did at home that you felt good about—some home repairs or improvements, cleaning out a drawer, a tool shed or a flower bed, preparing special meals, creating new recipes. And how about at the office as well?
• Think about the joy you brought to a friend, a neighbor, or a store clerk, for example, because you took the time to say thank you, offered them a ride, cooked them a meal, watched their children.
• Think of the support you received from someone.
• Think about the events you planned, the vacation(s) you went on, the surprise gift you received, the letter(s you wrote or card(s) you sent.
• Think about the progress you made on some project—at work, at home, as a volunteer, an employee, an entrepreneur.
• Think about a book you read, a workshop you attended, a talk you heard that inspired you.
• Think about something new you learned—figuring out a new smart phone or software program, getting on Facebook, connecting with old friends and making new ones.
• Think of other new discoveries, new adventures, new learnings, new insights, new growth experiences.
• Think of the people you spent time with who made you feel good.
• Think about family members you love unconditionally, and those who love you.

2.  Take time to be grateful for everything on your list (and remember, you can always add to it as you as think of more). Recognize that, no matter how many challenges and disappointments you may have had, there were a lot of things that lifted you up and brought you some sense of joy or accomplishment—that warmed your heart.
It’s easy to dismiss these things, or not even take the time to make this list, but when you stop, recognize and acknowledge things that are working in your life—even if they seem very small—there is often a shift in your thinking that begins to move your forward. Start paying attention to what IS working!

3. Review your 2011 list and recognize how much you survived, lived through, and actually enjoyed! Then as you’re thinking about what you want to accomplish in 2012, or if you get a little bit discouraged, remember all that you did in 2011!

Feeling better about yourself puts you in a better frame of mind to tackle some new challenges and create more of what you want in your life. How much easier it is to start your New Beginnings with a smile on your face!

New Thought for 2012:

I am choosing to experience an ever-increasing sense of clarity, peace, order, balance, harmony, joy, and freedom in my life.

And so it is!

The post New Beginnings appeared first on Conscious Order.

What if you thought you could get organized? Wouldn’t that make you feel better? Yes, but how do you do that?

Henry Ford once said, “Whether you think you can or cannot, you are right.”

The key is to pay attention to your thoughts and practice changing them.

When you find yourself saying “I can’t get organized,” start saying, “I can get organized!” Little voices may pop up, but when you keep practicing this new thought, something shifts. Organizing one small space starts the process. Acknowledging that you have organized this one space can inspire you to organize another space, and another.

The key is to train yourself to acknowledge any thing that is already organized—your calendar, your checkbook, your silverware, your hobby supplies, your music, etc. Notice the order in the night sky, the rising and setting of the sun, the design of a flower, the books at the library, merchandise in a store or arrangements of pictures on a wall. Look for order everywhere.

Author and psychologist Wayne Dyer says, “If you focus on what you really, really don’t want, you’re going to get more of what you really, really don’t want.” Conversely, if you focus on what you really, really DO want, you’ll get more of that. What do you really want? If you want more order, focus on order. Find order, acknowledge it, and pretty soon your thoughts will change and it will be easy for you to say, “Yes, I can get organized!” Better still, put that in present tense and proclaim, “Yes, I am getting organized!”

The post Think You Can’t Get Organized? Think Again! appeared first on Conscious Order.

Think about family members, friends or neighbors who might enjoy using some of the things you have. Think about charities you would like to support—including shelters and services for those less fortunate than you. If you have extra coats or sweaters, for example, think about the people who have none, and how grateful they would be to have something warm to wear in the winter.

A client loved clothes, her closets were jammed, she had recently retired, and her life had changed. She heard about a local non-profit that provided free wardrobes for those needing outfits for job interviews and for work.  Once she pictured in her mind how much others would enjoy wearing some of her beautiful clothes, she got inspired and within two weeks had taken more than four carloads of skirts, pants, blouses, sweaters, jackets, shoes, scarves, purses, jewelry and other things she once treasured to this wonderful destination. She was thrilled to finally be able to pass these things on—in the midst of it all she exclaimed, “my stuff is just flying out of here!” And it felt so good to have more room in her closets for the clothes she kept.

Before you start sorting, think about where your things might go. Make a list of the people and organizations who might appreciate having what you are not using. Keep these destinations in mind, and your sorting can go more quickly and be much easier. It can be exciting. It can be very satisfying. It can be magical!

The post Got Too Much Stuff? Who Needs It? appeared first on Conscious Order.